Looking for a way to secure your relationship longterm?

Welcome to my 8-week on-line class offering:

Habits for Happily Ever After

Invest in the lifetime of your marriage. You pour energy, planning, and money into your wedding day, but what about investing in the marriage you long to create for a lifetime?

I am excited to offer an 8-week class, starting September 28, that will bring you closer to your sweetheart.

Sorry, registration is now closed. (If you’ve already signed up and are looking to log in to the class, please do so on the Altared Spaces Member Site.)

Read on to discover how this class will help your primary relationship and why I’m so excited to bring it to you.

Looking for a way to secure your relationship longterm?

I am Rebecca Mullen and the thing I’m most proud of in my life is my marriage.

My husband and I met in junior high school so we grew up together and navigated a lot of changes. We’ve been through big adventures like flipping a raft in the icy waters of the Alsek River in Alaska. And we’ve comforted each other during several family deaths including my mother, step-father and brother. We have struggled financially for years, and, later, we learned to invest together.

Why am I proud? This is not the same marriage we started with. I would say that our marriage died twice and we managed to find something new in the ashes of the old. During those resurrections of our love we both had to grow. I noticed I was pretty controlling and he realized how important it is to me that he communicate. It’s been a wild ride, far more frightening than that raft flip and lonelier, at times, than losing my mom.

I made a vow after my parents’ divorce, that I would create a whole family. Have you heard the life-mastery phrase: do one, see one, teach one? I searched out every resource I could find to help me understand what it takes to make a relationship work during the difficult times as well as the times of joy. I’ve been practicing see one for 50 years. I’ve been in the do one phase of marriage for more than three decades. Now I’m eager to share with you what I’ve learned, and I want you to join me as I teach one.

Help for couples who want to grow close for a lifetime.

Want to trust more and lean into a relationship with your spouse? This class will offer you habits to connect. It doesn’t matter what stage of marriage you’re currently in; what matters is that you are willing to examine the habits you have (or don’t have) and make changes.

New to Marriage?

You just got married (or you know you’re in a forever relationship) and you want to establish productive habits from the beginning.

  • You want to be prepared. You’re worried about the high divorce rate and want the
    predictability of good habits to help.
  • You’ve got a great partner, but they’re having trouble communicating.
  • You want to address the little things before they become big problems.

Dating was easy. But now you need to know how to have a discussion about cleaning the toilet or how much to spend on groceries vs eating out so you’ll have money to go on vacation or buy a house some day. This class will help you establish productive patterns from the beginning.

Been married awhile?

You’ve been married a while and real life is eating away at the fairytale you wanted to be living.

  • You’ve asked. And asked and asked. Your partner still doesn’t get it.
  • You still love each other but the zest is gone. You don’t laugh like you use to.
  • Your sex life isn’t in trouble, but it’s not exciting either.

The little problems that were easy to overlook in the beginning are major stumbling blocks now that you have kids, two careers, and a car that breaks down regularly. This class won’t waste your time with psychobabble. You’ll get productive exercises that yield true results.

What Does the 8-Week Class Cover?

Do you want to continually grow closer to your mate over the course of a lifetime? Habits for Your Happily Ever After is all about the practical habits that minimize problems and maximize joy.

We’ll cover the following topics. Click on one to learn more.

Your partner disappoints you or fails to keep a promise.

Expectations. It’s helpful to have expectations sometimes: at dinner an expectation like, “You will shop and I will cook,” makes life smoother and avoids both of you coming home with a mountain of groceries. But we all have invisible expectations. You’ll comfort me when I cry. I’ll change the tires on your car. These invisible expectations can get us into trouble. Learn to see expectations you didn’t know you had, and understand how those expectations set you up for success or failure.

There’s a difference between alone and lonely. Have you ever felt lonelier in your marriage than when you’re alone?

Friendship. You want to feel understood by your spouse. Marriage is more fun when you feel you have a confidant to keep you company after a bad day. When you don’t feel understood you get guarded and uptight. This can cause your relationship to get stiff or formal and you stop sharing secrets or withhold information. Moments when there is a lack of understanding happen in life, so it’s good to learn habits that guide the return of relaxation and ease. When you can laugh together you’ll feel more bonded.

Every heard yourself say, “It’s easier if I just do it myself.” But secretly, you wish you had help?

Partnership. You want to feel safe with your spouse. Marriage eases the stress when you know you’ve got a teammate who will rescue you when your car breaks down.
When you don’t feel safe you worry who’ll help when trouble arises. Insecurity in your relationship can cause you to feel like things aren’t fair and you’ll keep score of little things or get greedy when it comes to sharing. If you’re going to spend your life together you’ll certainly face a few troubles, so it’s good to learn habits that will anchor you as teammates so you face problems together. You’ll feel energized and fulfilled when you accomplish life together.

You love your spouse, but sometimes you’re bored.

Lovers. You want to feel wanted by your spouse. Marriage lubricates life’s tiny stresses when you are well anchored in affection and have a passionate partner. When you don’t feel wanted passion dies and you get bored or begin to look elsewhere. Resentments build easily and you look at other relationships with envy. Life will be boring at times so it’s important to cultivate habits that feed your zest for life. You’ll feel confident when you approach
life as a shared adventure. And where adventure and zest are alive and well, there is always more sex.

You ask and ask, but your partner doesn’t get it.

Communicate. You want communication to be easy. We love each other, so this shouldn’t feel like work, right? Well… the love you feel is filled with all sorts of invisible expectations as I’ve already mentioned. Almost every couple says to me, “We need to communicate better,” but what does that mean? You’ll learn to listen with gentle purpose and develop habits to help you reveal what didn’t feel like it needed to get said. When you feel heard and you are able to talk comfortably, the little gremlins that haunt your relationship have no where to hide and connection is easier.

You know your partner loves you, but you don’t feel like your relationship is their priority.

Prioritize. Your want to feel like you are a priority in your mate’s life. Sometimes your spouse says you’re a priority but you don’t feel like a priority. You know that prioritizing your mate is key. But how do you make your actions reflect your intentions? Knowing you matter isn’t the same as feeling like you matter. You’ll learn habits that, when repeated, make your spouse feel important to you and you’ll be able to identify habits your partner can practice that lets you know that you matter to them.

You used to find your partner so attractive. Lately, you only see them in stained sweatpants.

Attract. You want to know your mate is attracted to you and you want to feel attracted to them. But after a long work week you just want to spend the weekend in your
jammies watching TV. What is the value of attraction? Are you shallow if you think your spouse looks good for everyone but you? How can you make sure you’ll be more attracted to your spouse the longer you live together? Learn gentle habits so you can increase the attraction you feel.

Invest in growing toward one another. Join the class and learn habits that will nurture your happily ever after.

How Does the Class Work?

During the 8-week class, a lesson arrives in your email each week in the form of a story, workbook or game. You’ll have a chance to interact with other couples about the habit changes for that particular week in the members-only platform. A weekly webinar with Rebecca allows the class to dive deeper into examples of the habits as well as offer the chance for a couple to receive hot-seat coaching so everyone can learn together. These classes meet Tuesdays September 29-November 17 4pm Pacific/7pm Eastern. You can attend live or via recording.

We’ll address topics like these:

  • Your spouse never takes a turn cleaning the kitchen.
  • You and your mate used to have fun together; but now it’s boring/frustrating.
  • You want more sex (or the converse: you want less sex).

Most couples don’t have habits like these in place. Or if you do, you haven’t specifically named the habits. When you name them and offer them a time and place in your life, your marriage benefits. Less fighting. More laughing.

Want to Participate?

When is the best time to start a habit that will sustain your relationship? The first day that relationship started. When is the second best time? Now. Registration is now closed. We’d love to include you next time, subscribe to get on our email list.

Sign up for the Mailing List

class-images1

You Will Benefit If…

  • You want to figure out how to get your partner to take their turn cleaning.
  • You want to use your money to build an estate not just pay the bills.
  • You want to stop nagging and start understanding.
  • You want to develop habits that will keep you happier.

class-images5

This is Not for you if…

  • The problem is that you partner won’t do it your way.
  • You won’t invest a little time in conversation with your partner.
  • You resist new ideas or ways to employ them.
  • You think “love is all it takes” and “trying harder” is enough.

Testimonials from Students:

  • ”Rebecca's unique gift to marriage is that she has x-ray vision for finding happiness hidden in daily routines. She's not afraid of conflict and has experienced plenty of turmoil. But she has a keen eye for what is working and she is practiced in letting go of what's broken. Couples will gain from her insights and habits, of that I'm certain.

    Dawn LarsonFamily Psychotherapist and Founder of Colorado Therapies

  • ”"Rebecca literally breathed with me." "Rebecca’s voice and teachings are with me always and for that I have endless gratitude." "Very useful class and enthusiastic teacher." "A very skilled teacher. I loved this class." "Excellent class! Well organized with truly helpful hands-on writing exercises. Fabulous instructor!"

    Class AttendeesFrom a survey distributed by course organizers

  • ”Awhile ago Rebecca introduced me to the idea of a turtle step: setting a goal so small that it seems laughably easy. And in this class, she encouraged me to pair a turtle step with a reward. So instead of spending an afternoon tearing my closet apart, I decided to spend five minutes a day decluttering my children’s outgrown toys and clothes and then ten minutes treating myself to looking at pictures of my kids.

    Kristen LevithanNew York

  • ”Your class helped me set some boundaries and choose how to interact. Thank you!

    Jon MaraschinExecutive Director Business Incubator

  • ”You are midwifing this course, Rebecca. 🙂 I didn't realize it! Thank you for inviting me to lean in to it, for breathing with me, for believing in me.

    AE

Sign Up for the Mailing List

Sign Up for the Mailing List

Thank you for your interest, HHEA is already underway but we’d love to include you next time. Get on our email list to be the first to know next time the class is offered. (Intrigued but still not sure if Habits for Your Happily Ever After is the right class for you and your mate? Have a few questions? I’m here. Feel free to reach out via email: rbcamullen@gmail.com, call or text to 970-210-4480.)